There is one key factor that can do more to guarantee your
success in life than anything else. Conversely, the absence of
that factor will be a sure guarantee of a life of failure and
almost continual disappointment. That key factor is
responsibility.
It sounds like something your mother told you when she was giving
you a smack! Well, she may not have been that far off the
mark....
However, responsibility in its widest sense is extremely
positive. It means that you, and nobody else, has control of
your life. If you have control, then you can change things. You
have the power. It is not in somebody else's hands - your wife,
the government, your parents, your boss, your accountant, the
stars......
Responsibility is not a popular doctrine. Instead, the world is
full of people who give away their power to others by refusing to
accept responsibility in their lives. They make excuses and find
someone else to blame for their misfortunes or failed dreams.
They can give you an endless stream of reasons for why they
failed to complete what they first began or, worse still, never
began in the first place. Indeed, our society seems to be set up
to cater for this sort of attitude. People can grow up and live
an entire adult life without once learning this vital lesson so
imperative to their happiness.
The sad thing about this attitude is that whilst it seems to
serve us well, it really does not. You may certainly get a
sympathetic ear for a while. People may even agree that you're
quite right. However, in refusing to own your part in events, you
give away your power. To whom? Everyone and everything outside of
you. If YOU are not responsible for the various events in your
life, then who is? Answer: other people, enemies, random forces
of nature, the stars, fate or anything else you care to name.
If this is true, then there is logically nothing you can do to
improve your situation. You are only going to get slapped down
every time you try to achieve anything worthwhile. So why bother?
Sadly, that is usually how people who take no responsibility for
their own lives end up thinking.
The result for people who think this way is that they soon end up
with "learned helplessness" and are rendered incapable of
striving for any worthwhile goal. They lose the capacity to
believe in themselves. Thus, they lose the vital capacity of
persistence towards a worthy goal. The first stiff breeze easily
blows them against the rocks. And then they point to their latest
disappointment and say, "You see? I told you!"
It's a vicious circle. However the circle is easily broken. The
solution is to take responsibility for everything that takes
place in your life. Even if you cannot see how you possibly could
be responsible, it is still a far more powerful approach to own
responsibility than to deny it. Also, from a wider
spirit-centered view of our universe, there are many more levels
to existence than merely the physical. Hence there are more ways
in which we may actually be responsible for events without our
own limited consciousness knowing about it.
You may be very willing to own responsibility when things turn
out as you planned. However, most people look beyond themselves
for someone else to share the credit when things go wrong! The
attitude of people who master life is to be responsible for all
that happens. In doing so, they awaken to the fact that they are
creators of their destiny; not merely leaves being tossed in the
wind.
Here's an example from my own experience. I recently employed a
solicitor to do some legal work for me. In fact, I had wanted to
use someone else who specialized in this area. However, when I
told my current solicitor, he insisted he could do the job just
as well and beat the quoted price drastically. So he got the job.
Result? It was a disaster. He was every bit as lacking in
expertise as I had originally suspected. In total, it cost me two
months in wasted time and also a fair amount of money.
Whose responsibility was this? Many would blame the solicitor.
After all, he was incompetent. No doubt about it.
However, the responsibility is actually mine. The choice was 100%
mine. I could have used someone else from the start. Or, as
things began to go wrong, I could have terminated the
relationship earlier. I did not properly inform myself to start
with, or I second-guessed my initial instinct. By taking
responsibility for this, by seeing the sequence of my choices
that led to this situation, I assert my own power to cause
results and make the correct decision the next time. By refusing
to do so, I give the power away to the person I hired. So it
could happen again. It is obvious which is the better strategy
for life!
Whenever something happens in your life, for good or ill, tell
yourself, "I am responsible." Then ask yourself, "How am I going
to handle this?" However bad a situation may be, if you repeat to
yourself as an affirmation, "I am responsible", then you begin to
look to yourself for the way out instead of to external forces.
In truth, you are looking in the right direction. You are the
true manifester of your own destiny.
This is the way to take control of your life instead of leaving
it in the hands of blind forces. It may sound hard or callous at
times. However, it is not. You are not saying, "It's all my
fault." Rather, you are saying, "I have the power to affect my
life - for good or ill - and I choose to consciously exercise
that power and take responsibility for whatever consequences I
attract." How much better than blaming the stars, or your boss!
Once you take responsibility for everything that happens, you
build a firm foundation upon which to build your long-term
success. Leave the excuses for someone else. Set your face firmly
in the direction of excellence. Take responsibility!
Copyright 2000, Asoka Selvarajah. All Rights Reserved.
Dr. Asoka Selvarajah is an active writer/researcher on personal
development and esoteric spirituality. Asoka's work helps
people achieve their full potential, deepen their understanding
of mystical truth, and find joy in their true soul's purpose.
Subscribe to his free ezine, Aspire To Wisdom, and receive his
brand new E-Book "Inner Light Outer Wealth" for free at:
http://www.aksworld.com/AspireToWisdom.htm?MOTQ
You can visit his website at http://www.aksworld.com?MOTQ
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